Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Homosexual Advocacy Group Wants God To Apologize

Homosexual Advocacy Groups have expressed dismay at God's perennial bestseller title The Holy Bible claiming that it makes derogatory and hateful remarks about homosexuals. Of particular contention between the homosexuals and God is His statement, "Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, 10 nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God." (1 Corinthians 6:9-10)

According to the spokesperson from ATALBG, "God is perpetuating a stereotype that homosexuality is not normal and advocating discrimination against the homosexual community. Comparing homosexuality to thieves and drunks is bigoted and should not be tolerated. We are seeking an immediate public apology from the Almighty."

More militant groups such as the Rainbow Army are calling for a complete banning of the book and laws against people who disseminate God's book through spoken or written form. Meanwhile, people such as the Archpriestette Schori is trying to calm the strife between God and the homosexuals claiming that this was an remark later added by the editor.

God's response to all of this, "People, I don't hate you. I hate what you are doing. Didn't you see the part where I said all people are sinners? Or did you just add on 'except me'. The fact remains everybody is equally sinful, but I still love you enough that I was willing to go to the cross to die for you. As for an apology, don't expect one any time soon. I do not apologize for telling the truth and insisting on a certain level of morality in my creation."

This is of course a parody of events surrounding Gen. Peter Pace. However, the truth remains homosexuals are sinners in need of a savior just like everybody else.

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