Monday, June 4, 2007

"Committed Relationships"

What is a "committed relationship"? It is nothing more than a buzzword created to normalize that which is deviant. Most of the time you see the term used in the context of homosexual relationships. The idea is to play off the human emotions elicited by a positive term such as committed. The word "committed" is generally regarded as positive because it evokes a trusting feeling that makes us feel safe. Unless, of course, you mean being committed to the funny farm, but then even that can make us feel safe. Commitment is a good thing, however, when used in the modern context of committed relationship it rarely means a good thing. It is a classic example of calling something good which is in reality bad. Typically, I have heard people excuse couples living together by saying at least they are committed to each other. Bah! If they were committed they get the legally binding piece of paper declaring them to be married.

This brings me to my next point. It used to be that marriage was the penultimate symbol of commitment, so in years past if you wanted to say you were committed you got married. Not anymore. Now it is just a means to get health insurance. People approach marriage with about as much commitment as there is spelling ability in the Clinton campaign. A fact which is illustrated by the abysmally high divorce rate. Rather than making a commitment to better themselves and work through the problems, people bail through the easy route of no-fault divorce. Couples now request vows that no longer say "till death do us part," now they want "until love does end." With the collapse of marriage it is no wonder people want to slap the label of committed relationship on deviant behavior.

Maybe, that is answer. No, not giving deviant behavior a new label. Rather we need to restore marriage as the safe place of commitment. Dismiss no-fault laws and reward those who seek to be committed to a person outside of themselves.

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